Systemic therapy is designed to meet the needs of couples specifically so we normally recommend this approach but we can incorporate others also.
Relationship counselling for couples, typically brings couples or partners together for joint therapy sessions but it can also be helpful to seek individual therapy prior to or alongside this kind of therapy. During relationship therapy or marital counselling you and your partner will meet with a psychologist to talk about your relationship together. With your therapist you’ll learn skills to solidify your relationship such as open communication, listening, empathy and boundary setting.
At Psytherapy we offer relationship therapy for couples that runs according to bespoke and adaptable treatment plans, tailored according to the individuals’ needs and therapy progress. These can incorporate systemic, cognitive behavioural and psychoanalytic approaches to psychotherapy as well as relationship counselling and group therapy.
Therapy for jealousy and insecurity
People feel threatened when they believe a situation may destroy something that they value highly (such as their relationship with their partner). And jealousy has its roots in feeling threatened. When experienced within a relationship, it can be triggered by real situations, for example a partner being dishonest or uncommunicative.
Sometimes jealousy is justified and occurs naturally. In cases where jealousy is experienced when a partner is seen to actively flirt with another person, or if their partner began to secretly spend significant amounts of time with a person they could legitimately form a relationship with – such jealousy would be deemed rational. These new relationships could, rationally be perceived as a threat to their own relationship. When a person is made to feel jealousy in this way, this may be grounds for reviewing the relationship from both person’s perspective because the person has justified reasons to feel jealous.
However, some people have a tendency for jealousy in relationships that is unhealthy. When this is the case, they may display signs of jealousy when there aren’t rational grounds for believing that their relationship is threatened. This kind of jealousy in relationships is often borne out of insecurity. When a person is vulnerable in this way, it becomes harder for them to trust that their relationships will thrive and their partner won’t abandon them. They may experience this due to their inbuilt personality or as a result of previous experiences. Both individual psychotherapy and couples therapy can help to remedy relationship problems caused by jealousy.
Couples therapy can help address issues relating to insecurity in relationships by:
- Tackling underlying issues within the relationship
- Tackling underlying problems with trust and security, personal to the individual(s)
- Improving understanding of partner’s jealous and insecure feelings
- Showing individuals how to support and alleviate negative feelings of jealousy in each other
- Demonstrating commitment to relationship and the other person
This online self-assessment is a useful indicator of your tendency to get jealous in a variety of situations. Cognitive Behavioural Therapy is a tried and tested approach to alleviating individual problems of jealousy.
Therapy for infidelity
When either or both people have been unfaithful, in order to rebuild the relationship, they need to repair the trust and navigate the healing process together and individually. A therapist can help the couple to learn about their needs and relationship goals and provide opportunities to explore the reasons the person engaged in infidelity. This could include low self-esteem, lack of emotional intimacy, sex addiciton, avoidance and depression.
Couples therapy can help address issues relating to infidelity in relationships by:
- Helping person who has been cheated on work through feelings of self-blame
- Exposing and exploring unnoticed reasons the person engaged in infidelity
- Addressing feelings of guilt experienced by partner who cheated, before this manifests itself as severe depression or anxiety
- Addressing feelings of anxiety and insecurity experienced by both people
- Working through the strengths and weaknesses of the relationship, identifying the couples commitment to one another
Therapy for relationships that are ending
Couples going through separation or divorce, can find it helpful to gain closure on their lives together. Counselling and psychotherapy sessions provide the opportunity to explore deeper problems which either went unnoticed or couldn’t be resolved.
The objective of doing this is to minimise hurt and hostility and allow for a less bitter future. Without the pressure of trying to fix the relationship, closure counselling often brings honesty and openness in the place of anger and blame.
Couples therapy can help address issues relating to separation and divorce by:
- Minimising the impact on children and other family members
- Making sense of what has happened – both good and bad
- Allowing for change and progression
- Offering perspective and closure
Visit our systemic psychotherapy page to find out more about this type of therapy, target towards couples and families. Or to find out more about, or book, therapy for you and your partner get in touch.
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