It is often difficult to establish the cause of difficult feelings on your own or even understand what one feels. When feelings take over it becomes extremely challenging to see the big picture. In these times we need a fresh perspective to help us un-tie mental knots. In therapy, you will gradually begin to see what is causing your feelings or lack of those, what do they mean, how to distinguish them, what are the factors reinforcing your feelings, you will look at your options, and make the best choices with a clear mind.
Difficult feelings are often caused by inner conflicts that are not easily apparent. It is not uncommon that we want different things at the same time or even stand in the way of getting what we want. Our inner life is extremely rich and there are various parts of us that may have different needs, fears, and expectations.
Inner conflicts may be expressed in the form of a feeling of having lost own path or purpose in life, not knowing who one is and what one wants, feeling despair at the aging process and limitations imposed by the reality of life, feelings of being excluded or abandoned, feeling of not being good enough, not knowing why does one behave a certain way, life transitions, misalignment of values and desires, social pressures, difficult family experiences, work-life challenges, not knowing whether to remain or leave a relationship, lack of clear values that lead to indecisiveness and much more.
The complexities of inner life can be discovered by looking at their own behaviour as a dispassionate observer, making sense of the function it serves. In psychotherapy, you will be encouraged to keep your mind as open to new ideas as possible. This creates a space for seeing oneself in a fresh light. Your psychotherapist will encourage you to view your dreams as an important expression of your inner life and to pay attention to its meaning. You may have vivid dreams, repetitive or frightening dreams, or perhaps no dreams at all, each circumstance will point to the way your mind is dealing with the pressures it encounters during the day. Your psychotherapist will offer you to look at less pleasant parts of yourself that Carl Jung referred to as “shadow” and ways they affect your life in negative ways. In psychoanalytic psychotherapy, you will use a variety of tools to learn how to decode your inner life and become a more unified human being. As inner conflicts are getting resolved and various parts of you align in a single purpose you will experience feelings of happiness, freedom, and vitality.
Whatever you are experiencing right now will gradually make sense as you continue exploring the connections that played a vital role in becoming who you are. Understanding your own story and the roots of your “schemas” (learned patterns) can be liberating in itself and many experience the feeling of breaking the chains of attachment to unhelpful behaviours and people.
As your decision-making process undergoes renewal, you will be able to distinguish areas of your life that you can change and areas that you cannot do anything about. Your psychotherapist will assist you in learning new skills that can enact desired change or help you accept and live with something that cannot be changed. The flexibility of mind and the ability to adapt to life’s challenges will contribute to overall happiness that is within your reach.